


How Not to Impress a Human

by Siamese_and_Cookies



Category: Fables: The Wolf Among Us (Video Game)
Genre: Bigby has it hard, Bigby tries though, F/M, Fluff, Friendship, It goes back and forth a lot, One-Sided Attraction, Pre-Canon, Sort Of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-12
Updated: 2019-08-12
Packaged: 2020-08-20 04:14:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,212
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20221621
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Siamese_and_Cookies/pseuds/Siamese_and_Cookies
Summary: Dead animals do not make good courtship presents for humans. Bigby learns this the hard way. Snow White is not impressed.





	How Not to Impress a Human

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic in a few years. This had been sitting in my drive for a while (read a few years) and I finally got around to posting it.

Back when the fugitive Fables first reached the shores of New Amsterdam, Snow White turned the Big Bad Wolf into a human with the help of a lycanthropie knife. She assumed that with the change into human form, Bigby would automatically assume a human conscious. The sudden increase in dead animals at her doorstep proved her wrong. Oh so very, very wrong.

**~ * ~**

At first Snow was puzzled at the dead bird at her door, the first of many. It had its neck snapped and was still warm; it had died recently. She tried not to think about it too much and disposed of the dead bird appropriately. She was going to ask Jack if this was one of his pranks but she had so much to do that day she plain forgot about it.

There was thankfully no bird the next day or the day after that. After almost a week of no dead birds at her doorstep, Snow just assumed the bird had died of natural causes. Maybe it hit her door while flying and broke its neck. She let the thought go and concentrated on building Fabletown up.

When, after another week of no dead birds, she was surprised with a dead rabbit at her door, this time badly mangled but dry of blood. Snow was deeply disturbed; only some sort of animal could have done this. But why leave it at her door? Again, the idea that Jack Horner may have done it as some morbid joke plagued her mind.

She let the thought go, perhaps some animal had hunted the rabbit down and accidentally dropped it at her door. Snow didn’t want to believe someone among the Fables (because there was almost no way the Mundies could have done this) wanted to play such nasty pranks on her.

Again, two days later a dead fox was laid to rest at her door, again badly mauled but bloodless. The thought that a deadly hunter stalking their lands came to mind and she began to seriously worry. Snow then rationalized that a dangerous predator would not leave its kills at her door. She wondered if she should ask the other Fables if they had dead animals come up at their porch.

It wasn’t until another dead animal (a chicken this time) wound up on her doorstep not one week later did she stop making excuses. She turned to Bigby, hoping his wolf senses would help in tracking down the disturbed Fable who was tormenting Snow like this. She met him in the little cabin he was appointed on the edge of the town.

“Mr. Wolf! Mr. Wolf I need to talk to you about something important. Are you home?”

“Miss Snow?” a voice called from inside the cabin and soon Bigby’s gruff face appeared at the small square window. When he saw her, his face lit up.

It was no secret that Bigby adored Snow; she was the first person, the first Fable, to think of him as more than some heartless beast or to at least act like she thought otherwise. It was an honor Bigby greatly accepted and wanted to uphold. He did his best in class and tried to avoid turning back into his wolf form if he could help it. He really did want to please Snow and show her that her gift to him was well worth it.

Bigby quickly emerged from his cabin and stood to attention, a barely concealed smile on his face. It was almost... endearing under any other circumstance.

“Is something the matter, Miss Snow?”

“Mr. Wolf I was hoping if-” Snow paused suddenly not quite so sure if she should ask Bigby this or if he would be willing to help her.

“Yes?” Bigby asked, scratching his jaw, a scowl flashing as he must have realised his stubble had grown into almost a beard already.

“Mr. Wolf, someone has been leaving dead animals at my door. I would like you to find out who and ask them to stop. It is most disturbing.”

“Dead animals at your-oh!” Bigby suddenly backed into the doorway of his cabin and Snow watched him, puzzled. “I’m-I’m so sorry Miss Snow, have they been disturbing you?”

“Mr. Wolf is something the matter? Do you know about this?”

“I must confess, I’ve been the one leaving the animals at your door.” He turned his head away, a soft blush adorning his cheeks.

“You! Good heavens man, why?” Snow crossed her arms, a frown setting deep upon her lips and her eyebrows furrowing. Bigby had better have a good explanation for this.

“We wolves, and most other animals, present dead animals as-as gifts. I wanted to give you something as a gift- to thank you for all the kindness you have shown me. I see it might not work the same with humans.”

“Bigby Wolf, have Mr. Crane’s lessons taught you nothing?” Snow shook her head, letting her arms drop and a sad sigh escape her.

“They have!” Bigby rushed to amend himself, “Master Crane says that I am becoming more like a human by the day!” he added in a lower tone, “But still far from a man.”

“Well, Mr. Wolf, let me give you this lesson. As thoughtful of you as it was, we humans tend to _not_ cherish dead animals at our doorstep. If you want to show your gratitude, do so in another way. Help the person through difficulties, purchase a gift. Or, if you must, hunt and present the gift yourself, kindly do not leave it at their doorstep for them to find. I thought it was some mindless child bent on scaring me out of my wits!” 

Though, in a way, Bigby was like a child. He was new to human ways and Snow understood that she had to be patient. She just wished he wasn’t so-

“I-I’m sorry Miss Snow, I won’t do it again.” and Bigby seemed very sincere about it. His expression was downcast and he looked more like a kicked puppy than a vicious wolf. Snow felt her heart shift and she let out a sigh, knowing she was defeated.

“Well, I hope so, Mr. Wolf. Although, your sentiments are appreciated.”

It took Bigby a moment or two but eventually he faced Snow White and gave her a small smile. He rubbed the back of his head and his smile remained sheepish.

“Thank you, Miss Snow. I will keep this in mind next time I wish to thank someone.”

“So long as you learn. And Mr. Wolf, another inquiry. Did you turn into your true form to hunt the rabbit and the fox?”

**~ * ~**

Bigby stared at the little box in his hand. TJ had wanted to give Snow a ‘gift’, a dead bug to be exact. A memory tickled his mind and he felt a faint smile form as he recalled his early years in the human world and how naive he was to human customs.

There were still many things that frankly baffled him but he was a lot better at dealing with the culture shock than when he first turned. If anything he almost expected some things and was surprised when it turned out they didn’t actually do something or that they did something even stranger. Humans really were strange beings, even after almost three centuries living among them.

Bigby made his way back to his office, ignoring the mile long line outside the Business Office. Bufkin and Snow would have a shitton of work today. Sadly, so did Bigby. He had the immensely dull job of filling out paperwork. He wondered if Snow wanted to switch jobs for a day. Bigby would take angry Fable Folk over hours and hours of dull black writing any day.

They both seemed to plough on if the movement of the hour hand and the constant cries of ‘Next Fable, Please Enter’ by either Bufkin or Snow were anything to go by. When seven o’clock rolled on, and the last of the discontent Fables had left, Bigby gathered what work he had done, dumped them in a folder for him to work on when his whole body didn’t hate him and made his way out of his office, locking the door as he went. More of a formality than an actual precaution. No one was stupid enough to mess with the Big Bad Wolf’s space. No one stupid enough left alive that is.

Bigby didn’t even bother knocking before opening the door to the Business Office, his hand reflexively reaching for his cigarette pack as his senses were suddenly flooded by Snow’s scent. It was something Bigby could never really block out, the one scent that stood out boldly among all others. The cigarettes just helped coat over the scent so it wasn’t as oppressive, wasn’t as tempting. It rarely worked. Still, he tried.

“Mr. Wolf, we really need to talk about your random urges to barge into the Office.”

“Mr. Wolf?” Bigby snorted, taking a drag of his cigarette and instantly relaxing as his nose had another smell to play around with instead of Snow’s. “Alright, Miss Snow, we will, just a day where my head isn’t gonna split open.”

“How do you manage to make calling me formally sound like an insult.”

“Because with the amount of history we have between us, calling you formally is an insult.” Bigby countered, leaning casually against the hardwood desk, sending Snow a contained smirk and a tilt of his brow. She just scoffed and repressed a smile of her own.

“Is there any particular reason you came in here or are you just here because you want to shirk your duties?” She laid her head back into the plush red leather of the seat, staring Bigby dead in the eye. 

God, she looked as tired as he felt.

“Technically I’m off the clock, and so are you. But I did come here for a reason. TJ; he wanted to give you something before he left.”

Bigby pulled out the little box with the dead bug and handed it over to Snow, remembering to give it to her lid-up. Snow held it carefully as if slightly unsure what it was, almost scared. For the first time Bigby wondered if Snow had ever received something that harmed her. He knew loads of Fables that wished Snow were dead, Hell he could name them all alphabetically. The thought that one of them had given her something that could hurt her under the pretense of a gift didn’t sit well with Bigby. He took a long drag of his cigarette.

Snow opened the box nevertheless and let out a small, almost inaudible gasp, but Bigby’s ears caught it. She was surprised and pleased, if the sudden shift in her scent was anything to go by. Shit, Bigby had to stop doing that. He took another deep drag of his cigarette and found her scent was a little more muddled.

“He said you liked the bug?” Bigby asked.

“Yes, I thought it looked beautiful. The colour is very rich. TJ is such a good kid, I feel awful for sending him to the Farm.”

“It’s Toad’s fault. If he spent half as much money on glamours as he does on alcohol, the story would be a little different.” Snow didn’t look convinced. Bigby tried it another way, “Look at it this way, TJ’s got loads of open space now. He’ll love it at the Farm. I know I did.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right, Bigby.” Snow let her eyes slip shut as she held the box in both hands, still being very careful with it.

He didn’t want to disturb Snow after she had such a stressful day but something was bothering him.

“Hey, Snow? Can I ask you something?”

“Yes, Bigby?”

“How come when I gave you dead animals you hated the idea but when TJ gives you a dead bug, you suddenly don’t want to lose it?” Bigby scratched his jaw and took another drag of his cigarette, “Just a thought.”

Snow opened her eyes and seemed to actually think about it, her gaze far off. When she came up with a satisfactory reply, she turned to Bigby, gave him a stunning smile (that almost had his heart stop) and said:

“You weren’t a cute baby toad.”

With that she forced herself off her seat, told Bufkin to close the office up and motioned for Bigby to exit the Office. He followed her into the elevator and escorted her to her door in total silence.

“I still don’t think it’s fair." Bigby continued, "I never had any chance against a pre-pubescent amphibian.”

“We all have to play with the hand we’re dealt, Bigby.”

And with that, she leaned forward and kissed his cheek sweetly, startling him for the second time that night.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, okay? Good night. Bigby.”

When she closed her door and Bigby heard her lock it did his tongue finally decide to work.

“Night, Snow.”

His hand touched the spot where she kissed him and he shook his head to dispel any wandering thoughts. He wouldn’t get any sleep if he thought too much about it. Damn it he needed another smoke. Maybe a hard drink too.


End file.
